Lose With Purpose

I'm really happy with this article. I use Warmachine as my main example, but I believe it can apply to any game you play.

Losing sucks. Being a lifelong gamer, I've been winning and losing games since the days of NES. Whether it's Mario is being killed by a fish in that stupid water level; I'm getting killed by a sniper in Halo; my warcaster is being pummeled by a warjack; or I lose another game of Magic to a combo deck, losing is something I've had to get used to. However, it wasn't until last year that I really started appreciating what losing can do.

The Buildup
When I started looking in to Warmachine, a common piece of advice I heard was "get used to losing when you start out." I figured they meant that there was going to be a learning curve so I shouldn't get frustrated. While true, they also meant that I should prepare to lose a lot, because it was a game that took a lot of finesse to play well.

At the time I found myself doing pretty well because I started playing just when my group did a journeyman league, which had you start off playing very small games (12 points worth of models; average is 35-50), and building up from there. Choosing Khador gave me a huge edge because my warcaster didn't need an army to win games. As a result my first several games had me breaking even, which was okay by me. Once the points increased, however, things changed.

When we hit the 25 and 35 point games, and I swapped out my original warcaster, I started getting a real taste of the game. I could still get my wins, but I had to really fight for them. When I started losing I got a bit frustrated with myself because I wasn't used to doing poorly and making so many mistakes in any game I play. I've never been unbeatable, but it's rare to find a game where I can't break even with a bit of effort. At this point I had a bit of a weak epiphany and decided that rather than getting frustrated, blaming the dice, or feeling like my opponent didn't play fair... I should figure out what I did wrong and work to fix it.

The Method
In Warmachine, your warcaster is the leader of your army; if that model dies, the game ends immediately, thus making it crucial to protect them. The first thing I noticed was that I was leaving my warcaster too exposed, overextending at the risk of losing the game. While I started out using her as a
coup de grâce, never putting her in danger unless I had a 90% chance of using her to win the game, I was now using her to soften up enemies with, at best, a 50% chance of killing them. Sometimes I wouldn't even expose her to kill the enemy warcaster!

So I went back to basics. I accepted that what I was doing wasn't winning me any games, so it wouldn't hurt my record to try something new. For my next few games I had one goal - keep her alive at all costs. I kept her behind buildings, in forests, put other units in front of her, whatever it took. I didn't care if I actually won the game, I cared whether or not she died prematurely.

It worked. Sorscha (or whoever else I might use) was staying alive. They weren't nearly as involved in the game as they should be, but I also wasn't losing the game because I strapped on a pair of wax wings and flew too close to the sun. From then on I systematically began improving my performance by examining what was consistently making me underperform in my games. Here are a few things I remember working on, all while remembering to keep my warcaster safe:

• Keeping my snipers away from melee units
• Making sure my very slow warjacks were able to charge before being charged
• Killing enemies with my warcasters' spells (a laughable goal for Khador!) or using offensive, non-damaging spells to knock down enemies, freeze them, etc
• Using a power attack with each warjack (headbutt is AMAZING)
• Using terrain in any way possible, including destroying walls on our Streets of Malifaux board we once used

The Result

I got back up to my 50/50 ratio! Sadly, this method isn't going to make someone an amazing Warmachine player. Any game with good, fair rules shouldn't have a way to win every game regardless of the opponent. A quality game separates players based on how they react to their opponents, not what they do in spite of them.

Warmachine players should know how to move their models around the table. Magic players should know which cards to use for attacking. Halo players should know routes to take for capturing a flag. However, all of that is theory and needs to be adjusted when your opponent is doing something that isn't by-the-books. I love strategy games, and I love incorporating strategy in to any game I play. Sadly, I'm rather terrible at it, and as a result I usually maintain an average rating in any game.

However, I stopped making silly mistakes. My warcaster wasn't dying because I thoughtlessly put them in danger; without thinking about it I was keeping them behind other models, using terrain, etc. My Widowmakers weren't dying in melee, letting them harass melee models who were all but incapable of reaching them. Everything I did had a purpose. Even though I was still losing games because my opponent outplayed me, they won because of their good tactics, and not my bad plays.

As a bonus, this also made me do better in other areas. I got a lot better in Call of Duty by adjusting my tactics rather than getting upset at dying. I still can't aim for beans, but at least I wasn't dying in the open all the time! Even parenting became a bit easier because I learned to accept that my own plans may not be working (especially during school with my daughter), and that it's more important for things to work well, rather than try to make things work how I want them to. Random? You bet, but it was a pretty cool revelation.

The Reason

So why write all of this? A number of things have been bringing this to mind lately.

• I'm finally going to play Warmachine after a couple months of relative inactivity, and I'm going to have to probably start this whole process again. I've gotten out of practice with accepting and learning from losses, so this is a reminder for myself as much as it's an encouragement for all of you.
• I've had some friends quit games on me because they get upset losing. I try to tell them to learn form their mistakes, but it's hard to reason someone who's in the midst of frustration's irrational grasp. I think something like this might have helped a few guys stay with the game.
• Writing I Can't Stop, and my buddy's comments on it, made me remember the importance of self-examination.
• Nothing brings a game down more than a frustrated opponent. We all know people who don't lose well; whether they throw a fit or just get a bit down, it's hard to play a friendly game when your winning comes at the loss of someone else's happiness. If you can lose happily, then I applaud you, but I also hope this can help you see losing as a good thing, perhaps even more beneficial than actually winning!

The Breakdown

I know I talk a lot, so here's something a bit more consolidated [while still being plenty wordy].

• Don't blame anyone else for your loss. Most games have random mechanics that determine our success - don't blame them if they seem to work against you. Don't blame your opponent for using unfair (but legal) tactics, bending the rules, etc. If they do something that bothers you, bring it up in game - it keeps things fair and may help them be a better player too. Trust me, it's impossible to get better if the loss is always someone else's fault.
• Don't throw a pity party.When I lose, it's my fault. I made a bad play, I didn't examine the board correctly, I didn't remember my opponent's model has a certain ability, whatever. It's important to rise above and accept the loss, rather than internalizing it negatively. Just like blaming someone else keeps us from accepting our mistakes, feeling bad for ourselves keeps us from having to learn from them.
• Start small. The first thing I fixed was keeping my warcaster safe. Everything else in the game could die, but that one piece had to stay safe. Find out one big thing you can fix, preferably something that loses you the game the most, and worry about that first. Other things may go wrong and that's fine. Your goal isn't to win the game, it's to keep doing one thing until it's ingrained in your subconscious. Trust me, you don't want to move on to fixing problem #5 until you can do problem #1-4 without much thought!
• Don't win. Okay you can win, but don't focus on it. This ties in to the previous point because it's important that your goals aren't related to actually winning the game. Winning requires you to interact with your opponent, and that I can't explain it any better than to use some do/don't examples:
  -In Warmachine my first goals were to focus on survival. That didn't mean models couldn't die; the point was that they didn't die because of anything I did. If my opponent is sending 20 models at a single piece, it might die and that's fine. As long as they didn't die because I senselessly put them too close, or left them exposed, or forgot about an ability, then I still did my job.
  
  -In Magic I've been working on saving my creatures until their attacks can be useful. Rather than just attacking because I can (see the I Can't Stop post), I've been trying to build up creatures until I'm at an advantageous-enough point that I can attack, lose some creatures, and come out on top in the long run. I might still lose, but at least I didn't throw away my cards.
  
  -In Call of Duty, I was making it my goal to play defensively in games with objectives. I might die a lot, and the opposing team might overwhelm me and get the objective, but my goal was to be a team player and not wander away from my objective because I might get a free kill or two. I also started expanding this to getting headshots. I made it a goal to always aim for the head; even if I missed often, I was succeeding because I was getting used to aiming for the head (dealing more damage) until it felt more natural.
  
  
  In all of those examples, if you were brave enough to read them, you'll notice that the goals are all about what's happening on my end of the game. My stuff stays alive, my cards don't go to waste, my objectives are defended, my reticle is aimed near the head. Whatever else is happening in the game is irrelevant because I'm committing my brain power to focusing on those goals.
• Start Over. Our brains can only handle so much information, and it's likely that problem #1 will crop up while you're working on problem #10. Again, don't get upset! Accept it and make it a point to fix it if it keeps happening. The last time I played my Khador army I had the game in the bag. I had at least half my army left, and my buddy had his warlock and one other model on the board. On my turn I casually moved my warcaster behind a hill, saying something like "Eh, I'll stick him over here." No strategy, no examination of the field, no purpose for where he was going. My buddy started his turn, walked his creature up to the hill and made the Warmachine equivalent of a Hail Mary, killing my caster in such an improbable way that still makes me feel violated.
  
  That was the single greatest loss I've ever had. Why? Because it reminded me that no matter how good I feel about winning, I haven't won until I've won. Since that loss, my goal has been to make everything have a purpose. Even if I have no idea what to do, I'm trying to make each move as strategically as I can. No more "Eh, let's do this just because" nonsense. That's how I lose key cards in Magic, it's how my wife beats me in Netrunner, and it's why I can't play armies or decks that use acceptable losses as a main strategy.
• Get feedback. This isn't something I've tried, but it's an idea I heard from either Muse on Minis or Through the Breach. The idea is amazing, and I'm bummed I hadn't thought of it myself. Two heads are better than one, so why not get a second opinion on your game? I think the key here is to talk to your opponent before the game and ask them to either point out possible mistakes after your turn, or just sit down after the game and get some overall feedback. I want to try doing this more often because you get extra feedback as well as the opportunity to see your mistakes from the other end of the table. Knowing how you failed is one thing, seeing it from the perspective of your opponent should be downright illuminating. [Josh, Fritz, whoever else might trounce me in the coming months... you have my permission to tell me why I suck at the game]

The End

I'm curious to hear what you guys think of all this. How do you handle losses? Will you try to incorporate this in to your future games? If you do, please let me know how it works out for you! This is all anecdotal, so I may just be out of my mind. But if you try this and it works, let me know so I can feel a bit better about writing so much!


See you tomorrow!

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